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29th September - Whatever planet Dunfermline manager Calderwood is on, let's hope he returns to Earth pretty soon. We all know that managers can get a bit worked up by the end of a match, but his accusations against our players were right out of order. He would be better served by having a long hard look at how his own team behave on the park and considering whether his own methods are entirely justified in his quest for results. Saturday's game was a physical one and both sides stood up for themselves, but it is plain that part of the Dunfermline script is to kick or trip everything that moves. Calderwood can't expect that the opposition will meekly accept the bullying and not do anything to assert itself. The Aberdeen is not made up of powderpuffs and as Livingston and Hearts have already found out this season, if anybody tries to mix it they'll receive as much as they dish out - probably with interest. Aberdeen don't set out to get opposition players booked, the players manage it themselves with their own artless attempts at stopping the Dons from playing. They should learn the lesson and just get on with the game.
Launching Saturday! At Waterstones, on Union Street 11 a.m. - 12 p.m. Starring Kevin Stirling, Neil Simpson and Doug Rougvie (and Old Beach Ender might well gatecrash)
Book Review: Morris The Butcher's Brither by Blin Lemon You are all exclusively invited to the book launch of the century at the glitzy Torry Battery: catering by Aitkens; bar by Norseman lager; hospitality by Snuffy Ivy, Cove Mary and Fool Annie! Yes, its fur coats and nae knickers all round, for the unveiling of "The Chuntie Book Of The Year." Here's your chance to read 27 of the shaggiest dog stories, tallest tales and spare rib ticklers, hilariously divulged through the mists of time and the fog on the Dee by that legendary racunteur from www.afc.co.uk, the notorious Blin Lemon. I'll back my hunch and bet this is a blockbuster, a real cult. Pardon? Yes, I did say cult, but I can understand your confusion. With a cast of hoors (the aforementioned Ivy, Mary, Annie and a great lot mair) and radges (the man himself Morris The Butcher's Brither, his brither Morris The Butcher, Johnny Norrie, Bobby Bland, Erchie Glen's Kaftan, TRF's very own Torryloon and an even greater lot mair), Blin shares with us MTBB's desperately hard days in 60s Torry, fleeing from nymphomaniac fishwives on a butcher's bike in six feet of snow with strings of mealie jimmies and Torry caviar (mince) flailing in his wake, supporting the Tommy Pearson-managed Dons through thin and thin, and kicking up hell in the Grampian and the Rats Cellar. Butcher hands on this meaty stuff at RetroBlue in George Street or at www.oxster.com Review by: Joffrey Poke
22nd September - TRF 52 is out this coming weekend and so is Kevin Stirling's magnum opus on the Dons' first 100 years. The llaunch is at Waterstones on Saturday 28th 11-12 - more on that later.
18th September - Last nights performance was a joy to behold after some of the dire fare that we have had from the Dandies so far this season. Ebbe Skovdahl has said that the UEFA Cup is a learning experience for his players, but maybe he can learn from it too. Give the Dons the freedom to go on the attack and they can put any team on the rack and whilst they may be struggling to score, their results will be no worse than we've already had and probably will end up much better. Every player came through the match with credit and the response that they got from the crowd goes to show what kind of football we all want to see. We've got a difficult trip to Livingston on Sunday, but if Ebbe lets the players get stuck in there's no reason to think that we can't win down there and make a significant improvement on our SPL position.	16th September - The Dons have been so maddeningly inconsistent this season so far that it would come as no surprise if over the next two weeks they were to turn over Hertha Berlin. Yes! That's right, the lunatic optimist at TRF Towers is expressing a belief in the faint possibility that we might just sneak into the next round of the UEFA Cup. It probably won't happen at Pittodrie, but if we can keep things very tight at home it would put them under tremendous pressure for the away game and that is where we might pull off the unlikely. Okay, this is cloud cuckoo land, but when the Dandies do play well they are mighty good. The problem is, of course, that a lot of the time they are pretty bad. What we need is for Ebbe to find the inspiration to inspire his players and give them the belief in themselves that they can make progress. Hey, let's just have a go, there's nothing to lose and everything to gain and it would go a little way towards making up for the dire displays against Celtic, Partick  Thistle and Dundee United at Pittodrie and for bottling it in Glasgow. Come on you Redzzz!
15th September - The news that the Dons have tried to sign Arild Stavrum just before the close of the transfer window came as a bit of a surprise to say the least. Now the window has opened for players who have no club and we are back in the market for the Offside King. Many fans will welcome the idea of bringing the Swede back to Pittodrie because he scored a reasonable number of goals, but equally many will feel that he is too much of a neep thanks to his languid stile that saw him getting caught offside so often. History shows that very few players can successfully return to a club once they have left and let's not forget that Stavrum actually walked out on us at a moment's notice at the very start of last season. A stunning slap in the face for any football club at such a time and he was pretty deceitful in the process. It may be simple coincidence that last season turned out to be our best in ages, he would probably argue that he could have helped make it better. The debate may rage briefly amongst the Rudolph community, but in the end money will decide. Stavrum will find it hard to accept the low wage levels now on offer and may not be convinced that he will be putting himself in the shop window.Maybe Ebbe Skovdahl with his quaint sayings and everybody's favourite uncle conversation technique will talk Arild into it. Either way it shouldn't take too long to find out.	12th September - Another day another shocker. It doesn't get any easier to take these defeats, no matter how often they happen. The manager seems to think it was just one of those things, but he is wrong. He sent out a team that, after the first three or four minutes, looked disorganised in all areas and over elaborate in the attack. The midfield spent far too much time deep in our half and the total lack of spirit for most of the game was a damning indictment of the management team. How come the top deck choristers keep chanting the manager's name like he is some sort of living saint? After more than three years in charge, he has a team on the park that only seems to lift itself when the opposition starts kicking lumps out of them (e.g. Hibs at Easter Road and Hearts at Pittodrie). If it hadn't been for our boys getting a mad on in these matches we might yet be waiting for points. It is the manager's job to motivate the players and he just isn't doing it - other teams manage to raise their game often enough, why not us? What is he telling them before games? "Mind you don't lose by too much", perhaps? There can be no doubt that we have players with ability, but that on its own is not enough. maybe some of them just believe that they are the business as they are, but if that is the case they need a graphic reminder that they aren't - defeat doesn't seem to do it, so maybe it is time for players with burgeoning reputations to be dropped for a game or two. Many of our players need to realise that they have to go out and prove themselves afresh in every game, what they did last season no longer counts. Sort it out Ebbe, we are facing two tough away matches in the SPL and we need to come away from them with something worthwhile or the next home crowd could be down to four figures.
Will the 50-50 work? Well, you'd have to ask the audience. The success of Keith Wyness' controversial suggestion to get the Dons and rangers fans cohabiting will ultimately depend on the good sense and responsibility of the hundred individuals chosen as guinea pigs. Good luck to them, I know I wouldn't want to do it. I am sure that the noble upstanding citizens hand-picked for the job won't have any bother being civil amongst themselves, but whether they continue to get along so well if and when the behaviour of those around them begins to degenerate remains to be seen (would it have been all cakes and ale on January 19, I wonder?). I'm sure all possible steps will be taken to guarantee the impeccable conduct of the Pittodrie 100 so the scheme can't do any harm, though quite what 'success' in this venture is defined as is difficult to fathom. There surely will never come a day when a significant number of rangers supporters are allowed to mingle unsegregated with those of any other SPL (Ltd) club, so it's obviously less of a water test than a goodwill gesture. Which is a dangerous thing for Wyness to attempt, as he is gaining something of a reputation around Scottish football for being all mouth and no trousers - the SFA's David Taylor has already told him to shut his trap and concentrate on his job; you can rest assured that his old farm counterparts were less than impressed with his infamous "Sauchiehall Street" gibe; and even elements among the Aberdeen support are voicing their unease at the way they see Keith courting back page headlines without necessarily delivering anything of substance. Although the papers fell over each other to applaud the limp, futile and insincere anti-bigotry schemes of the old firm several seasons ago, there was never much doubt that what could be seen as an AFC publicity stunt would be pounced upon by an avaricious media. MORE...	2nd September - Sunday's game should have seen our brave young lions stepping proudly onto the Pittodrie pitch, ready to take Partick  Thistle apart and show Scottish football that they are building themselves up to grace the European stage, never mind the SPL. Instead they sauntered on as though they'd rather be having a nap in front of the telly. There were honorable exceptions, but not enough to make the difference. Our team is woefully short of the pugnacious, "who are you looking at pal?" type of players that are an essential part of any bid to be successful. Yes, they can play reasonably good football, great at times, but where is their will to win? Can you imagine what any spies from Hertha Berlin were thinking as they watched the debacle unfold before their eyes? The must have been laughing into their bratwurst sandwiches. Hertha are a top German side, boasting lost of good players. It looks like they are big enough to bring in a massive TV deal for the Dons - enough to change the date and kick-off time of our home match, a deal that the Club would have been crazy to turn down. Maybe it is just as well that we have the home game first because, frankly, on that performance we are going to be minced. If the Dons' players don't shape up their ideas mighty fast and start stringing together some decent performances, they should be afraid, very afraid.

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